I went to work in the daylight today for the first time in about four months. It’s not that I haven’t been out in the sunlight during thing length of time, it’s just I haven’t been out in the sun for hours on in that length of time, and it felt like I was under some sort of laser. I mean, the sun never quits. It just hangs up there in the sky and blasts away, with no clouds, and no shade, and it just never stops. Has it always been like this? I can’t remember the sun being so bright before.
There should be The One Ring of Power for all this suffering, Precious. I feel like crawling down into the mountain where the sun doesn’t shine and getting the hell away from all of this. I feel exposed. It’s an odd feeling to actually see people I’m speaking with in full light. The realization there are people who are better spoken with in half light, dim light, or very little light is what makes the concepts of bars work. I had forgotten what some people look like first thing in the morning, and I could have gone a little while longer without the reminder.
The roads are a lot more crowded in the morning time than I seem to remember, and people are more aggressive and weird. But all the stores are open, and that’s a little odd. I saw my first school bus of the year, and it was more than a little strange to have to stop for one of those. Traffic is a lot faster during the daylight hours, or so I thought, and then it occurred to me that I can’t see as well in the light, at least when it comes to oncoming traffic.
At night, you can see traffic coming from a very long distance away, because cars at night drive with their lights on, generally speaking. During the daylight, you can’t see a car that is behind another car until it’s right up on you. It’s harder to see in the light because there are no lights. Does that make sense? I know most of the people who work at night, or at least their vehicles because of the lights they have but during the day everything looks the same if you can stand to look at all. The Shiny! It’s everywhere.
Morning people are grumpy as hell, have you ever noticed that? After a twelve or fourteen hour shift, these people appear normal because at that point the world is made of the grumpy, but these people who just got out of bed and are pissed off at the world? I mean, what the hell is up with that? You’ve been asleep while night people have been awake all night! Who has more of a right to be irritated at being up? Clerks at night are a little more civil, if for no other reason there are more crazy people out at night. God knows it’s dangerous being rude to someone who thinks they’re on a mission from talking road kill to save the universe from crystal aliens living under the overpass who are disguised as liquid graffiti spelling out the one true word of truth in florescent orange. Yeah, you learn to be a little more careful about what you say to strangers at night. These morning people who think seven AM is early need to stay up until that time of day and see what it looks like. Don’t harsh my squee that early in the day if you’ve been asleep in the last eight hours or so.
People don’t crowd one another at night either. If you missed the reason why you missed the one word of truth in any color. These morning people jostle around a bit much for my liking. I do not like human beings within knife range of me. It’s hard to get a cup of coffee without being within gun range of other people in the morning, but hey, at least you can keep the crazies from sticking you if you’re careful. Night people have a tendency to keep some space between one another, just in case, you know? Some of the morning people tell me working at night has made me paranoid somewhat, but I like to think of it as a heightened sense of awareness that everyone is out to get me.
Here’s what I really cannot understand; with all the normal people that work during the daylight hours, where is their share of the loons we get at night? Shouldn’t there be a higher number of people shuffling around with signs proclaiming the return of Elvis during morning rush hour? I feel as if I am on the very cusp of understanding something but it has slipped away from me, hmmm, but it has something to do with mental illness and hours kept.
Come Monday I’ll return to the night in all its glory, and escape the glare of the daylight sun. In two weeks, maybe less, the project will be done and I’ll be a day person again, I think. We’ve been at this since the last week of May and everyone thought it would e over by the end of August, tops. The very nature of human endeavor is procrastination, bad planning, delays because of weather, and downright weirdness. Toss in you’re turning a very large group of people; construction workers, truck drivers, equipment operators, half a dozen subcontractors, two paving crews, and a sundry project managers into vampires for the better part of six months, and you’re lucky to walk away with this without some new religion being founded or worse. Okay, maybe nothing could be worse than a new religion founded by night people, but you get the idea. I don’t think human beings were built to stay up all night unless they are welcoming some interesting changes in their brain chemistry, and with some people, that’s like stirring a thimble with a canoe paddle. I feel as if I am on the very cusp of understanding something but it has slipped away from me, hmmm…