The Holiday Season was a brutal one. From Thanksgiving until last night there wasn’t a lot of downtime at all, and I need downtime to write. The first part of November saw Lucas go under the knife for cancer and then Thanksgiving arrived. I had to meet many new people this Holiday Season and there was family weirdness that I didn’t see coming.
2013 began when I totaled my truck on January the second. It ended last night with me curling up and going to bed early, sober mostly, and not caring that midnight would come and go without me. 2013 ended as a year that saw a lot of damage and a lot of change in my life and I am glad to see that year go the way of the floppy disk.
2013 was a year that saw resolution in some areas where it was needed terribly. There were issues that lay open like wounds on my soul and like it or not, things happened that burned bridges forever, I suspect. Some people drift away and out of your life forever and some people set themselves on fire and run screaming away from you declaring that burning to death slowly would be better than spending another moment of their lives in the same hemisphere. You can only hand those people cans of gas and matches, and hope in some way, you can warm their hearts.
2013 saw me make a very dramatic change in the way I listen to music and what music I listen to when I do. I started listening to classical music to and from the veterinarians’ offices and pretty much got hooked on music that had songs that lasted over twenty minutes sometimes. The UBS port in my truck was a better perk than I saw coming. The cheap classical music that Amazon sells turns out to be stellar. There is some really great classical music out there and I like it.
2013 was the year I finally attended my first adoption event. I never knew what sort of effort that went into the life of Dog Rescue when it comes to those people who foster and tote the dogs around to see if they can find a forever home for those dogs. These people are the ground troops, the first casualties to stress and despair, and they get almost to recognition from anyone out there for all the work they do. It’s nasty, dirty, expensive, and totally worth it, if you’ve ever helped a dog find a family and a family find a dog.
2013 saw me change jobs, once again, and I think it was the right move, but time will tell. I won’t tell because I never talk about work online. Don’t ask.
2013 saw some good writing, some bad writing, and some new writing on old projects. It also saw me more active in the writer’s group I belong to and I realize that most writer’s live with the same demons I do, but mine are mine and their demons aren’t nearly as scary so there. But it is really enlightening to see how other people struggle with their craft, and prosper within it. Some people seem to improve with each meeting and others seem to just muddle their way through it. I wonder how I am seen through the eyes of those who write. I am more convinced each year that writing is what I was meant to do. It feels better each year and I find myself gravitating towards creative people whenever I can.
2013 saw me begin to become a Wine Snob. I have always liked wine but I never realized how much there was to know and how a good wine, yeah, a very good wine, could change the way a man looks at grapes forever. I have discovered that a good Cabernet Sauvignon has to breathe. I’ve discovered the good wine is all about the waiting rather than the getting to it. It’s a lot like foreplay with alcohol instead of alcohol being the foreplay. I like the Cabs. The really good ones are worth what you pay for them if you get to drink one of them with the right person.
2013 saw me drinking less because with wine it’s not really right to drink the good stuff alone and the cheap stuff, well, once you’ve had good wine it’s hard to down back down to the bottom shelf at Wal Mart stuff. I can honestly say I have never drank wine out of a box and now I never will. I have drank MD 20/20 and if you’ve done that you have seen things that most people will not admit to. But that was years ago.
Mostly 2013 was just another year. The parameters of the year are arbitrary, not set in motion by Universal events. Even the months are named by long forgotten rulers or gods. Each year or each period of time will bring whatever it brings and we’ll refine it within those restrictions that we have lived by, and therefore we define our lives, and thereby I have now defined mine.
2014 is already better than 2013 by virtue that I am still alive to see it. Each year we lose some we’ve known and some we’ve loved and we see more clearly each year there are fewer and fewer between us and Death. We march slowly onwards, preoccupied sometimes by the rules we decide are important yet at the end there is only the end and there is a lot more stuff that is unimportant than we would like to think. 2013 is gone now. All that it took with it will fade a little or a lot, depending on how strongly we feel, but 2015 will come for some of us and we will look back at 2013 like we do all those years that have fallen behind us now.
I hope this year is good to you and I hope your life is good for others as well.